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27-OCT-2009

Our Stuff



A few months ago I was trying to think of what to get my dad for Father’s Day. I try to come up with good things to get him. Things that are heartfelt and don’t come on a plastic card with a predetermined amount you can spend. I always end up defaulting and getting him a gift card from Dick’s. He truly has everything. I never know what to get him, though if he had his way, I wouldn’t get him anything. Ever.

I read in a magazine that the one thing you can give your dad is something you can’t buy. It’s something that, in the long run, means more than any tie. It means more than any book. It means more than anything else you could think of to buy him. The problem with store bought gifts is that they are never unique. No company makes ONE of something for you to buy. They make thousands, or millions of whatever it is you bought and people all over the world give them to their dads. What I gave my Dad, is my time.

Time for us to sit and talk. Tell stories that neither of us have heard.....or ones we have heard a million times. Time to complain about our days. Time to talk about our mutual dislike of Nancy Grace. Time to sit silently. Just time. Time to spend so that 30 or forty years from now I can sit back and remember the time I spent with my dad.

The time I bought came in this bottle. I couldn’t find it in Ohio, so I ordered it from a store in PA. There is only one rule with this bottle. This is OUR stuff. Nobody else’s. It can’t be drank alone and it can’t be drank with anyone but us. This is our stuff to drink while we talk about whatever we want to talk about.

Admittedly, I don’t know a lot about good whiskey. My dad does and he says it’s great. I think it’s great too, though probably for different reasons than he does. When I look at this bottle, it means something to me. It is full of memories that haven’t been made yet. Full of things that I don’t know about my dad because I haven’t asked. Full of life’s history and things yet to come.

That’s what I see at least. I think it tastes better because of all of that stuff that’s inside. If I have my way, I’ll leave this bottle with a little left in the bottom. Just enough that I can sip in 30 years and be transported to our time together. The time when we sat and talked.......or said nothing at all.

This is our stuff. Nobody else can drink it. Just me and him.


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John Buffin25-Mar-2010 19:09
I found a place not far from me that sells this.

It's on my short list.
Gail Davison01-Dec-2009 16:46
What a fantastic idea and worth a million of those plastic gift cards.
Carrie03-Nov-2009 01:08
Jim, you haven't made me cry but once, since I've known you. This has me bawling.. like a baby. Thanks. :) Enjoy your Dad.. enjoy every single moment you can. Soak it all up.. and deposit it in your memory bank, and know how very fortunate you are to have your Dad still be here.

I would give anything, ANYTHING, for just one more evening with my Daddy. They are truly irreplaceable.
Jen Bixler02-Nov-2009 00:15
Hmmm...I love FairE's story... and I love your Dad's comment and your story... maybe, you should have skipped the JM last night, LOL... all joking aside... my last conversation was with my Dad via the phone and I would give my left arm to have one more moment talking and GOOFING with him... this is special... never forget that. And thank you for sharing... Here is to our Dads!
Cindi Smith29-Oct-2009 20:19
Yeah, I don't have a clue of what to ever get my Dad. He doesn't drink, so I usually give him money because he's a woodcarver. Your words about your Dad just made me smile. A lot of love there between the two of you. Cherish each moment as it comes. My Dad means the world to me and don't know what I'd do without him. My life is much better because of him, just like your's is because of your Dad! I'm smiling right now!
Guest 29-Oct-2009 03:58
awesome jim. as usual, thanks for sharing something personal with us. for the past ten years or so it's common for my dad and i to swap police stories. his are always better....
Dad 28-Oct-2009 21:29
Great picture and even better idea. Makes me want to go pour another shot. Maybe you should keep it at your house to be safe. When are you coming next? Sooner the better. The next bottle is on me.
Mike Stobbs28-Oct-2009 15:58
I wish I could have my Dad back and do this very thing with him.....we did spend a lot of time talking over things...and that was great.......super Jim.....braVo...Mike
pkocinski28-Oct-2009 12:30
Times shared with our Dad are special memories - even for us girls...
FairEnigma28-Oct-2009 11:13
...sometimes when I called my dad, he'd check the caller ID then answer the phone with "...what do you want?!..." in his meanest voice. I'd pop of with "...I don't want anything..." In my pretend meanest voice back at him - then he'd laugh and say "...that's your problem - you don't ever want anything....what's going on...?" and then we'd start talking about the most random things...puppies...guppies...our quirky dreams...the garden...the kids....the grandkids...upcoming meteor showers. Once he surprised me by saying out of the blue "...you're the only one I've never worried about...out of all your brothers & sisters...I know you can handle whatever comes at you..." That's a pretty big deal coming from a man that spent his entire life perfecting his tough old gizzard persona and now that he's gone I remember the time we spent together just sitting and talking and it feels like he's still close by because we shared time...it really is the Best gift we can give or receive....
Máire Uí Mhaicín28-Oct-2009 09:51
Shared time, shared memories. The most valuable things in life are those we can't pay money for.
Guest 28-Oct-2009 06:11
wow...fabulous! Great photo...but the story behind it is so much more important...beautifully written!
Guest 28-Oct-2009 05:19
Good stuff, nice story. I have a bottle of 18 year old single malt scotch for those special times. Nice composition.
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