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01-JAN-2009

1-02-09.jpg

"Wow, we're very fortunate to have each other"


Well there it is for the whole world to see.
I have been cleaning out my basement for a couple days.
Just getting rid of some junk and clearing out.
I had avoided it for some time.
I knew there was stuff there that would make me sad.
Well with all the processing of the last week,
I decided it was time to tackle it at last.
That top thing was written in a card I found.
My ex wrote it to me about 5 years ago.
It was in an anniversary card to me.
If I had found it a week ago I would have been mad.
Now that I have a better understanding of the whole thing,
it did not have the same pull on me it would have.
Now I read it and I see something I didn't before.
She did what she was capable of doing.
Come to figure out the divorce did not have to do with me.
I mean I was involved of course but it was not about me.
I won't write here what it was about, but I understand it now.
Understanding that in hindsight makes it all easier.
So nineteen months later I am still hauling out.
I am still cleaning up from that whole event.
However the doing of that is now easier.
I am throwing things away without guilt or pain.
I see them and I process them, and then out they go.
I almost thought for 5 seconds that I would send her stuff.
Some things she left behind like dolls in buried boxes.
In the end I figured that she left them here on purpose.
Kind of like a woman leaves a bracelet in a car on a first date.
You know what I mean, in order to get the guy to call again.
And I had not thought about that particular situation for 20 years.
A movie I saw yesterday reminded me of it.
Anywho, so I did my processing and tossed it all.
The Christmas decorations, the dolls, the cards and the junk.
I am totally in the freaking mood for a cheeseburger now.
I'm going to get myself cleaned up and go out for one.
THAT sounds like a plan to me!
Or should I sit here and feel sad about this all?
Should I worry about the little guy in the picture?
Bwhahahaha. Nah, cheeseburger!


Nikon D40
1/60s f/2.8 at 28.0mm iso200 full exif

other sizes: small medium large original auto
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