It is often in times of struggle when I go to Jesus. It is then when I pray fervently, I worship wholeheartedly, and my faith is without question and doubt. I wait patiently for God to answer my prayers. Then, when that prayer is satisfied, I rejoice. I’m being transparent when I say that my rejoicing is usually momentary. I find myself taking the blessing for granted. I become numb to God’s word and I no longer seek him. I, Adrian Mesa, am “in control” of my life. I depend on me and on me alone. Suddenly, another struggle arrives. And again, I find myself weak and in need of help. I begin praying and seeking the presence of God. And the cycle continues…

I’ve seen this vicious cycle multiple times in my life. I’ve seen that I take my family, finances, and most importantly, my relationship with God for granted. I become so consumed by the “rat race” and the “money chase” that I fail to recognize myself slipping into the grips of the typical American lifestyle. A lifestyle that idolizes the 3 P’s, power privileges and prestige. I seek success and prosperity and having a happy and healthy family, all while leaving God in the background. That usually doesn’t work.

So now I have to ask myself, how do I break this cycle? How can I continue to seek God in times of need as well as in times of prosperity? In all honesty, it’s not difficult. Just as I wake up everyday and I have made it a part of my lifestyle to go to the gym, I MUST wake up everyday and seek God. When I arrive at work, I should take a second to read a devotional and prepare myself for the encounters that I will have throughout the day. Consistency is key. It is nothing more then that.

The bible identifies this Christian walk as a race. “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith” (2 Timothy 4:7). Often times, I have found myself running sprints in my Christian walk. I would attend a church retreat, catch fire, and soon after cool down. Then, I would attend a missions trip or maybe contribute in the community with humanitarian efforts, I would see God in those moments and soon after I would get distracted with the “daily grind”. Just like the story “The Tortoise and the Hare”, I found myself being the hare who would get far ahead in the race, but then I was lead astray.

This mission to Haiti has refueled my faith. It has reminded me of the extreme poverty that exists in the world. It has shown me how people who have so little are forced to depend on God for EVERYTHING. Although there poverty is visible to our eyes, their souls are rich in faith. In the USA, we depend on ourselves, on our degrees, on clever business practice and maybe if things work out we shoot God a quick “Thank you Lord”. The poverty of the soul that exists is not visible, but it’s a plague that is rampant even in the church. It is a plague which has infected me. My prayer is that this trip light a sustaining fire for the sake of not only myself, but for my family and everyone I come in contact with. I will finish this race. Nothing and no one can take my faith.



:Adrian