Ping http://www.pbase.com/image/67986243
Sometime a picture really moves you. Here is my response to the essay regarding the power of photography by Snootydog. I wrote this 3 years ago to deal with how difficult it was to make the decision to put first Labardor Retriever down.
End of Life Decision making: A Dog’s Story
“We can order more lab tests and X-rays.”
There is always something more that we can do. I spend my life talking about when it is the “time to stop.” Here, I am feeling guilty because it is time to stop for my beloved Labrador Retriever. The puppy that fell a sleep on my stomach at 14 weeks old, is now 12 years old wagging his tail, but no longer retrieving his favorite ball.
A trip to Italy and my dog goes to the kennel with an advance directive that authorizes a proxy decision maker the authority to terminate his life. My vet has never seen a “doggie” advance directive. My dog now has one.
Intractable vomiting. No clear diagnosis. Expensive phone calls from Orta Italy. Is it cancer? Would an ultrasound help? Steroids, anti-emectic, and palliation. Maybe, it’s inflammatory bowel disease. Thank god for steroids!
Three months later, he is wagging his tail, but now has stopped eating dog food. Constant drooling, which I learned from my Vet means nausea.
But, he is eating pizza.
It is so simple to be misguided by small thing (for the sake of hope) and forget the big picture. He is suffering.
Last ditch blast with steroids. Didn’t work.
Now, I am faced with the “decision.” Do I kill my dog?
Intellectually, I know that “kill” is the wrong word......Emotions are not always intellectually based.
One final walk on the beach-- one final trip to the Vet. Good boy.
March 1, 2003