A letter to America.

My dearest USA,
You were very naughty when you were an infant, and it took me a long time to forgive you your teenage rebellion and the long years we spent apart and in opposition. I am glad you quickly cast off your flirtation with the French and set about finding your own way in the world (and I am pleased you kept a kindly eye on your less headstrong older brother, Canada). Of course, during your formative years you missed out on our best years, for without you to concern us we were able to dominate the world for more than 100 years and to create an empire on which the sun never set - for our eternal pride and our eternal shame. Of course, as we grew old and tired you, our rebellious offspring, grew into yourself and soon the child was master of the parent and master of the world. That story might be coming to an end, but we cannot doubt that you have made us proud. Overall, our rebellious child has done well.
Yours,
The UK