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juan carlos - chapter one

(the below is what happens when three unsupervised girls go into some small eastern washington town and buy a gay dinosaur hand puppet at a garage sale ... Rawr!)
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juan carlos, hungry for a tasty snack, attacks the marymobile
juan carlos, hungry for a tasty snack, attacks the marymobile
quickly, he jumps to the roof to gain easier access to las chicas!
quickly, he jumps to the roof to gain easier access to las chicas!
mary, mary! watch out for juan carlos!
"mary, mary! watch out for juan carlos!"
a somewhat reluclant juan carlos hijacks the car and takes the wheel
a somewhat reluclant juan carlos hijacks the car and takes the wheel
(shhh. juan carlos only has his learner's permit.)
(shhh. juan carlos only has his learner's permit.)
rawr! juan carlos is hungry!
rawr! juan carlos is hungry!
eeerp! juan carlos is also car sick.
eeerp! juan carlos is also car sick.
meanwhile, back at camp, the baby elefante wanders off alone ...
meanwhile, back at camp, the baby elefante wanders off alone ...
suddenly, juan carolos emerges from behind! (i hope he didn't park the car illegally)
suddenly, juan carolos emerges from behind! (i hope he didn't park the car illegally)
juan carlos loves tender baby elefantes! rawr!
juan carlos loves tender baby elefantes! rawr!
rawr! you are mine baby elefante, all mine!
"rawr! you are mine baby elefante, all mine!"
i can smell your spicy brains!
"i can smell your spicy brains!"
suddenly, the elefante spins around and shoves a cow femur into juan carlos' open mouth!
suddenly, the elefante spins around and shoves a cow femur into juan carlos' open mouth!
i'm not afraid of you, juan carlos! your voice box is broken and your teeth are dirty!
"i'm not afraid of you, juan carlos! your voice box is broken and your teeth are dirty!"
chomp! whatever, elefante.
chomp! whatever, elefante.
knowing she's about to die, the baby elefante asks for a ciagrette
knowing she's about to die, the baby elefante asks for a ciagrette
(good that she's using the filter. tabakkie stumps yer growth.)
(good that she's using the filter. tabakkie stumps yer growth.)
cough! juan carlos hates the smell of cigarette smoke.
cough! juan carlos hates the smell of cigarette smoke.
uh oh! juan carlos is distracted by a finger.
uh oh! juan carlos is distracted by a finger.
oh! juan carlos gets the raised finger of luv!
oh! juan carlos gets the raised finger of luv!
(hey! who is photographing my ass???)
(hey! who is photographing my ass???)
captured by j2, juan carlos undergoes friendliness training
captured by j2, juan carlos undergoes friendliness training
rawr! rawr!
rawr! rawr!
juan carlos is given a no biting/rock climbing training session.
juan carlos is given a "no biting/rock climbing" training session.
cisco teaches juan carlos about love
cisco teaches juan carlos about love
cisco then teaches juan carlos about captain crunch(R)
cisco then teaches juan carlos about captain crunch(R)
tina tries to reform juan carlos and his evil ways
tina tries to reform juan carlos and his evil ways
tina breaks juan carlos' spirit
tina breaks juan carlos' spirit
broken and battered, juan carlos finds love in the arms of mary
broken and battered, juan carlos finds love in the arms of mary
juan carlos loves mary
juan carlos loves mary
juan carlos sighs with inner peace
juan carlos sighs with inner peace
suddenly, juan carlos goes insane!
suddenly, juan carlos goes insane!
juan carlos knows where the baby elefante is hiding
juan carlos knows where the baby elefante is hiding
come out elefante!
come out elefante!
Rawr!
Rawr!
juan carlos will get you!
juan carlos will get you!
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