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Dave Beedon | all galleries >> People >> Seeking Enlightenment > Becoming One With The Rock is not always easy, even for serious devotees
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Becoming One With The Rock is not always easy, even for serious devotees

Monitor Butte (near Moab, Utah) view map

I am driven to seek Enlightenment by becoming One With The Rock. The rock is always sandstone, especially Moabian sandstone, which is the richest kind---and it's not even mountain-grown!

Enlightenment is easily achieved on vast expanses of the rock such as fins, blobs, and slabs. Occasionally, when I'm far from such features and feel in need of Psychic Mineral Union, I "take what I can get" as it were. On a hike around Monitor and Merrimac buttes I was overcome by a need to understand the universe, and the only medium available was this boulder.

After a prolonged session of meditation in this position I was jolted out of my expanded reverie by the annoying tingling produced by a family of vampire scorpions crawling up my leg---inside my pants. It's a real psychic bummer when Mother Nature's critters ruin an attempt to fly through a galactic vortex. The remainder of the hike was of little interest after this disappointment.

As always, my photographic assistant (Joe Tripod) just stood around while all this meditation took place. That's his forte. He completely understands his universe and does not need to meditate.


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Guest 20-May-2008 03:15
the worst of "Wild Kingdom"
1moremile30-Jan-2008 12:14
I can see why you are exhausted.
I myself passed a kidney stone once but it wasn't quite as large as your's.
Dave Beedon01-Nov-2007 22:11
John, I hope you are joking about the declining possibility. To win an award for using clear, concise written language is my life's goal. To illustrate my fervor, I offer this example (my October 30 comment): .
John Cooper01-Nov-2007 21:17
Blobs of metal, at concentric circles.
A unique description Dave, you are a Wordsmith, first class.
Sadly The Crystal Award possibility is fading fast.
Guest 01-Nov-2007 16:42
well I've been stoned a couple of times myself
Dave Beedon01-Nov-2007 06:56
Right on, John! There are many ways to ascend the psychic stairs to a level of Greater Awareness. Some devotees fight it out with musical instruments. Some paddle canoes down rough rivers. Some practice yoga. Some shoot little blobs of metal at sheets of paper that are decorated with concentric circles. The Bhagwan Hotair Windbag of Notner advises his followers to "Choose the path that makes your feet feel glad they walked on it."
John Cooper01-Nov-2007 06:37
This is awfully reminescent of a scene in a film I saw once.
I do not remember the title, but the phrase Duelling Banjos springs to mind.
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