I am in full-body contact with sandstone bedrock next to a rough dirt road Canyonlands National Park, southwest of Moab, Utah. Lying here was an attempt on my part to channel the energy of Moabian sandstone for the purpose of achieving an elevated state of awareness (Enlightenment).

I knew from repeated painful readings of "The Sacred Paths to Oneness," a dense spiritual treatise by the Bhagwan Hotair Windbag of Antelope, that by remaining motionless for at least 7.1 hours on Moabian sandstone it is possible, with the proper posture and attitude, to understand things that are known to very few. This process, described in detail in the text of the gallery "Seeking Enlightenment," appeals to me because of its simplicity. Increasing my understanding of the universe is a way to better myself, which will lead to an increased ability to serve the Bhagwan, who is my spiritual guru.

So it was on this hike on Shafer Trail. I started the hike at the top of the road and descended to its end where it joins the White Rim Trail, another rough dirt road. While descending physically I felt the need to ascend spiritually. Thus I laid down here, pressing myself against the sandstone for 7.1 hours, remaining motionless the entire time, hoping to ascend to a new level of understanding. In spite of my fine posture and lengthy exdurance, I was unable to reach the Level of Awareness that I longed for. All I learned from my valiant effort was that chads on paper voting ballots are not named after
Chad Stuart of Chad and Jeremy.

The rest of my hike was completed in a daze of disappointment. Later I reviewed page 1348 of "The Sacred Paths to Oneness" and discovered the reason for my failure: as mentioned in footnote 71 (with italics, no less!), true Enlightenment cannot be achieved, even when using Moabian sandstone, when one is within 7.1 meters of an unpaved road. I was closer than that to the road, thus my attempt was doomed from the start. In the spirit of humility, I treated the experience not as a failure, but as "an opportunity for personal growth."

The reader might wonder why I was here and why I was walking on a road rather than driving. I was here because of the notorious reputation for Shafer Trail and was walking because it was the safest and most pleasant way to experience the road and the surrounding scenery. Shafer Trail is a mecca for four-wheel-drive enthusiasts and mountain bikers, but both of those modes of travel require total concentration on the road itself. Watching the scenery is not an option, even though the scenery is stupendous.

Shafer Trail has tight switchbacks, steep slopes next to its edge, sandy sections, and absolutely no guard rails or other safety infrastructure. Taking one's eyes off the road is a sure way to become part of the scenery---at least until your remains are removed by the local authorities. Therefore I decided to walk down the road to get the maximum benefit of the scenery without the risk.

Pictured here is the lower, easy portion of Shafer Trail. “Shafer Trail” is a commonly-used name for this road, though its official name is “San Juan County Road 142.” The casualness of the naming creates confusion. More on the naming of roads in this corridor is available in another gallery
("Official Naming of Roads Near Potash").
.