Third Row, Center!!!

Sure, there is a story of how we got them.
But that isn't really important right now.
What is important is why I was there.
It was a celebration of life.
It was the 11 year anniversary of the accident.
I wanted to go to New York.
Buffy wanted to go to New York.
So we went, and had a blast.
Everything worked out just great.
This show was one of the highlights.
But really, the whole trip was a highlight.
Every cup of coffee to every bus ride.
All of it was great.

It brings up something on my mind.
I think back on my marriage a lot.
Mostly trying to understand it all.
I spoke yesterday about "The Whole Package".
But I never really tell the story.
My ex has gone through several reasons for leaving.
Three that I know of, and probably more.
But the first one was the one that hit hard.
She left me because she wanted "TWP".
Well, it was one of the reasons she gave.
Really the biggest at the time.
And since she said that it bugged me.
It was hurtful in a very core kind of way.
Not just how she said it, but the words themselves.
I had thought I was a pretty good guy.
But here she was telling me that I was crap.
Later, after the divorce she changed her mind.
All of a sudden I was actually a good guy.
I then became the yardstick to measure others.
In her typical fashion, what she had sucked.
But what she wanted would make her happy.
This time it just had to do that, right?
So she left full of spit and vinegar.
I found out later I was the whole package.
But I never would have been for her.
That is what "The Whole Package" means.
Each one of us wraps that differently.
I have no idea if she found hers.
All I know is I found mine.
And I am smart enough to know it.

Why am I writing this today?
Because I think I am coming to another point in it.
In this whole "divorce" thing.
There have been a few stages like this.
Filled with intense thought and discovery.
Truths I came to understand along the way.
And I am finishing one of those now.
There were moments right after it happened.
Moments after the court stuff.
Moments of getting out there again.
Moments of meeting new friends (and old ones).
I think I understand a lot more now.
The whys and the wherefores of it all.
I also came to understand it could have never worked.
We were destined to fail from the start.
My hindsight is very clear today.
There is a strange thing about experience in life.
It teaches you lessons very well.
It is the way we learn and grow.

All this has nothing to do with the third row though.
Because this is the other side of all that.
The side that happens with Buffy.
We would have been happy anywhere in there.
We would be happy with whatever happened.
If we didn't get tickets, museum instead.
And we would have seen new things there.
And lived life as it was meant to live.
It didn't have to be the third row.
But it was really cool that it was.
When you are happy with life,
Life is happy to you.
Have a great day!

And yes, I am babbling today :-)